Even if you believe in love at first sight, you don’t really know if you will be walking down the aisle, saying your “I dos” and living happily ever after. In fact, your faith may not even include walking down any aisle. You may be super charged and excited to have your wedding before you discover all the obstacles that come into play. Let’s put that aside for a moment. You ought to be excited about the big event and what it means for you as you plan to spend your life together. Key point here, plan to spend your life together. I want to give some pointers about planning because you will have to face your differences and it won’t be good if you have swept it under the rug. I believe that our differences can enrich us and bring us closer together, but you must have open dialogue.
Here are a few tips to help you get through your differences:
- Talk about your faiths openly. What you like about it and what you don’t. How your faith will be actualized in your life as a couple and as you build your family. Do not deny that you have differences.
- Understand the culture that you plan to create for your family and how both faiths weaves in. Let love be the root of everything because it is.
- Be open about experiencing each others faith. It doesn’t mean it is time to convert. If converting doesn’t make sense to you, why would you do it? Don’t lose your identity. Remember your culture and faith shaped who you are today and that is who your partner fell in love with. Work together and remember each other needs to be true to their identity.
- Don’t have expectations of each other unless you both agree to them. If you’re planning to continue going to the temple and you think he will start going after the wedding…guess again my dear. That likely isn’t going to happen.
The main thing that gets us through everything is communication and what is most important is that no matter what we share the same values. We have the same dreams and desires. Build a strong foundation and start building that foundation before your get married.