What to Do When Mom Objects Your New Black Girlfriend

Every parent has an idea of who they see their child choosing as a companion. We ourselves have an idea of our perfect mate.  Life has its turns, spirals, and surprises.  I grew up in a mostly white area and I remember there was a German family that lived around the corner from our house. The parents were racist, raising up five children who fortunately, did not catch the racist bug.  In fact one of the children had her own set of children that ended up choosing to be with a black man and had bi-racial babies.  Proof that no one can predict which way cupid will shoot his arrow.  When a love connection is made, it is too strong to rip apart.

So what do you do when you decide to date someone that mommy isn’t going to be excited about?  I recommend that you hang out with your new girlfriend long enough to decide if you are comfortable with her.  When you know her and YOURSELF well enough, you will feel more confident introducing her to your mom.  You have to be bold and handle everything with love.  If you are already ready to defend your new gf, then it means you are assuming the worst.  Just assume that your mom is going to come from a place of love to. Be casual.  If mom speak up with shame, then you must still respect your mom and speak candidly and kindly from you heart.

Being respect is due because she gave birth to you.  At the same time, you have to be strong with who you are and what you believe. After all, mom has raised you. If she trusts in the good job she has done with you, then she ought to trust your choice.  Let mom know the things that you like about your gf and share some of the unknown interesting things about her. This will begin to open mom’s eyes and her heart.

One step at a time.  It is important to teach your mom along the way. That’s the only way she is going to learn. So don’t hide or keep them apart. Slowly merge their two worlds.

 

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